{"id":2346,"date":"2018-12-27T16:05:07","date_gmt":"2018-12-27T22:05:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/neverdonewithfun.com\/staging\/5228\/?p=2346"},"modified":"2018-12-27T16:07:25","modified_gmt":"2018-12-27T22:07:25","slug":"an-open-letter-to-elf-on-the-shelf","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/neverdonewithfun.com\/staging\/5228\/2018\/12\/27\/an-open-letter-to-elf-on-the-shelf\/","title":{"rendered":"An Open Letter to Elf on the Shelf"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

How One Annoying Toy Helped This Mama Rediscover the Magic of Christmas<\/em><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Dear Ralph,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I know we didn\u2019t get off to such a good start. I handed you over to 2-year-old Easton (uh, guess I should have read the story first to learn that whole no-touching rule). And Easton promptly stuffed your hat down his throat, gagged himself and threw up on you. From that inauspicious beginning, you were Ralph. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I let you languish each Christmas since then, left in the Rubbermaid or plopped on a literal shelf, stationary for the whole month of December. I thought you were a little creepy. I didn\u2019t like your storybook or threatening my kids with you tattling to Santa if they didn\u2019t behave. And I decided we weren\u2019t going to be a family that did Elf on the Shelf, because who has time for that shit??<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This mom, it turns out. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"An
Rock-Climbing Ralph and His Everest: The Top of the Christmas Tree<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Yes, the day after Thanksgiving this year, the boys pulled you out of the \u201ckid Christmas\u201d bin (sorry, there\u2019s that no-touching rule broken again) and set you under a light-up tree. That\u2019s where you were going to stay all season long. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"An
After-Hours Cookie Decorating and Sprinkle-palooza 2018<\/a><\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

But somehow, you fell from your spot to the floor and the next day Easton found you and was convinced you had moved on your own. He yelled at you and told you not to be naughty or he\u2019d punch you in the face. I was a little alarmed at his level of intensity honestly. Those aren\u2019t the words any mom wants to hear from her 5-year-old. And then his next question was, What do you think naughty Ralph is going to do tonight?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Well, you know I can\u2019t bear to disappoint my boys. Thus, overnight, purely by accident, we became a family that does Elf on the Shelf. And my catchphrase for the holiday season was born: F*cking Ralph.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"An
Ralph In the Ball Pit<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

But, Ralph, after a couple nights of pretty tame relocating around our house, the first snow of the year came and school was cancelled. I couldn\u2019t resist the opportunity to write \u201cSnow Day!\u201d on the window with soap and press your little face up to the window excitedly, just as I knew my boys\u2019 faces would be the next morning. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"An
Snow Day<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

There was no going back now. We were all in. I had committed. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, Ralph, while I frequently drop F-bombs in conjunction with your name as I remember to move you only after I\u2019m already in bed for the night, I\u2019m eating my words and offering you an apology.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"An
All Quiet on the Christmas Front<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

You showed a mom feeling exhausted and overwhelmed this holiday season that it is the littlest things that mean so much to our children. I wasn\u2019t feeling the Christmas spirit…until I started looking forward to Easton\u2019s gleeful giggle each morning before 6 am. Sometimes I could literally count it down: 5…4…3…2…1… Cue the laugh of delight as he found your latest antics. Even Sawyer started crawling into my bed and asking in his charming toddler way, \u201cWhat Elf do today, Mommy??\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"An
Ralph Goes to the Aquarium<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

You brought so much joy to our holiday that on Christmas Eve night, Easton asked to write a last-minute letter to Santa to see if you could stay through his birthday on the 29th. How could I say no to that?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"An
“Santa said I can STAY!!”<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

So, thank you, Ralph. With only two more nights until Easton\u2019s birthday left, I admit that while I won\u2019t miss moving you at 10 pm, I will miss the wonder and whimsy you brought to December. Thank you for forcing this mama out of her Grinch mindset and reminding me the holidays are more about experiences than things. Christmas really is for the kids<\/a>, and Ralph, you and I made a pretty darn good team bringing the magic for my kiddos this year.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"An
Christmas Eve Goodbye Note<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Until next year, friend. Hope you get to put your feet up in the North Pole for a minute (because you know I don\u2019t get to around here). And just so we\u2019re clear, I\u2019ll welcome you back next December with open arms…but I\u2019m still not cooking you a Pinterest-perfect welcome breakfast with powdered-sugar snowflakes and candy canes. Every mom\u2019s holiday cheer has its limits. 
<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"XOXO<\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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